Are You A Bitch To Other Women?

It’s not often that Sex and the City gets described as “innocent” but have you seen the buzz surrounding Sarah Jessica Parker’s interview in this months Harper’s Bazaar?

She claims that the characters in the show were part of “a more innocent time” and that women  are no longer supportive of each other.  She blames the rise of social media and reality tv that show women to be “pretty unfriendly towards one another”.

“They use language that’s really objectionable and cruel and not supportive. I like to remember that Carrie and the other woman in Sex and the City were really nice to each other.”

And she’s not wrong, is she? I have to admit, one of my guilty pleasure’s is watching the Real Housewives Franchise (in particular Orange County, New York and Beverly Hills) and even though I know that a lot of it is scripted and I’ve seen enough of them by now for it not to shock me, it really does shock me. I find cat fights and backstabbing extremely cringe worthy and unattractive. Yet I continue to tune in.

I suppose I keep watching to see whether anyone answers the question:

Why would people want to hang around in such toxic environments with women who are so competitive and downright mean?

Because I just don’t get it.

It seems that “mean girl syndrome” is rife; from mothers outside the school gate to groups of friends thriving off the drama that discontent brings.  Maybe Sex and the City showed an idealised version of friendship but surely being a woman and existing with other women shouldn’t be so difficult?

There are always going to be people that you don’t like and don’t gel with so how about just avoiding those people or when you can’t avoid them, tolerate your differences to co-survive in peace.  Do we REALLY need to scream and fight and be so vicious?

Kate Figes who has written the book The Big Fat Bitch Book
suggests that girls are under pressure – and ‘bitch culture’ is the result. She says that the trouble is that girls see bitching celebrated on television by admired celebrities and, for example, on Big Brother. They hear their mothers bitching about each other on the phone or at the school gate. Naturally they emulate both.

But can we just blame tv and social media? I don’t think so. I think that we’ve always been this way.

The problem in regard to the internet is that it allows an anonymous culture. People are given the freedom to type out abusive comments without the threat of confrontation.

And as for tv, well that by its very nature isn’t real and it depicts human relationships in a cyclical way for ratings and buzz – unfortunately, humans like to emulate behaviour and as a result female friendships are suffering.

So what do you think? Do you support other women? Are can you understand the cruel and vicious nature of modern friendships? Do you worry for future generations of friends?

Author: Rachael

I'm a journalist and creative consultant. I write about how busy women (just like you) can live, work and eat - better.

2 thoughts on “Are You A Bitch To Other Women?”

  1. First off, great picture of Sarah Jessica Parker. As far as supporting other women? I do. I can see where you’re coming from though. Interesting post!

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