You are not for everyone – and that’s ok

I posted this a while ago, but thought it was time to update it slightly as it’s one of my most popular posts.

I stumbled up an image on Facebook (at the end of this post) which is an excerpt of Rebecca Campell’s book Light Is the New Black: A Guide to Answering Your Soul’s Callings and Working Your Light

Here it is:

You are not for everyone

The world is filled with people who, no matter what you do, will point blank not like you. But it is also filled with those who will love you fiercley. They are your people. You are not for everything and that’s OK. Talk to the people who can hear you.

Don’t waste your precious time and gifts trying to convince them of your value, they won’t ever want what you’re selling. Don’t convince them to walk alongside you. You’ll be wasting both your time and theirs and will likely inflict unnecessary wounds, which will take precious time to heal. You are not for them and they are not for you; politely wave them on and continue along your way. Sharing your path with someone is a sacred gift; don’t cheapen it by rolling yours in the wrong direct.

Keep facing your true north.

I cannot tell you how much, every time I read these words they resonate with me.

These really are some wise words – in all aspects of our life. From work to friendship to relationships. Life is just way too short to spend time and valuable energy trying to convince someone that you are for them.

It’s hard if you’re a people pleaser to get used to those five simple words. It may be deep down in your psyche to think about what others think about you and how their opinions should come before your own. But really, it doesn’t have to be that way.

The more you become yourself, the more you will find that your people will flock to you. It may not happen overnight, but that’s no reason to give up. Being disliked by someone is no real reflection on you, it’s just that you’re not their person.

YOU ARE NOT FOR EVERYONE. Those words should be in your daily mantra and if you’re currently in one sided friendships where you’re only picked up when you can do something for them or you’re chasing a client that means that you constantly have to sell yourself – pack that shit up and move on.
You are not for everyone. And that’s OKAY!


Monday Inspiration #005 – Where GOOD Ideas Come From

I don’t think I’m alone in my fascination about the daily routines of creatives. Which is why I love this video by Steven Johnson on where good ideas come from.

Everybody who does creative work has figured out how to deal with their own demons to get their work done. There is no evidence that setting up your easel like Van Gogh makes you paint better. Tactics are idiosyncratic. But strategies are universal, and there are a lot of talented folks who are not succeeding the way they want to because their strategies are broken.

The strategy is simple, I think. The strategy is to have a practice, and what it means to have a practice is to regularly and reliably do the work in a habitual way.

There are many ways you can signify to yourself that you are doing your practice. For example, some people wear a white lab coat or a particular pair of glasses, or always work in a specific place — in doing these things, they are professionalizing their art. – Seth Godin