Forget happy – be whole

It’s the UN’s International Day Of Happiness so there’s no better time for this quote…

This is my happy place taken in Sardinia
This is my happy place taken in Sardinia

I actually attack the concept of happiness. The idea that—I don’t mind people being happy—but the idea that everything we do is part of the pursuit of happiness seems to me a really dangerous idea and has led to a contemporary disease in Western society, which is fear of sadness. It’s a really odd thing that we’re now seeing people saying “write down three things that made you happy today before you go to sleep” and “cheer up” and “happiness is our birthright” and so on. We’re kind of teaching our kids that happiness is the default position. It’s rubbish. Wholeness is what we ought to be striving for and part of that is sadness, disappointment, frustration, failure; all of those things which make us who we are. Happiness and victory and fulfilment are nice little things that also happen to us, but they don’t teach us much. Everyone says we grow through pain and then as soon as they experience pain they say, “Quick! Move on! Cheer up!” I’d like just for a year to have a moratorium on the word “happiness” and to replace it with the word “wholeness.” Ask yourself, “Is this contributing to my wholeness?” and if you’re having a bad day, it is.

—Hugh MacKay, author of The Good Life

I like the idea of working towards feeling whole instead of happy. And it’s OK not to feel happy all the time.

p.s since it’s International Happiness Day – Please share with me what makes you happy…

 

Author: Rachael

I'm a journalist and creative consultant. I write about how busy women (just like you) can live, work and eat - better.

4 thoughts on “Forget happy – be whole”

  1. It’s not just striving for happiness that’s important, it’s dealing with emotions, both the good and bad. I do believe that positive thinking works but it’s not something I’m very good at. My family makes me happy and they keep me grounded.

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